Tuesday, April 6, 2010

SEEKING NEW CAREGIVER FOR JORDAN

Yah, that is what I thought, no takers....LOL I am just kidding.

I got the EEG scheduling appointment. I need to keep him up until midnight...let him sleep until 4 am and keep him awake from 4 am until his 10 am appointment. YEAH! this is going to be my single most stressful day EVER....and it is 3 weeks away. I really think all these "rule out" tests are a real test of how much I am capable of...how strong of a woman an I really...lol Well this is one tough mamaa'.


I have had a busy couple of days cleaning up from Easter/putting away decorations and packing for our get-a-way. I plan to relax out there (hotel) and let it just be family time. We have all our toys, pool side clothing and everything we need to stay right there and have a great time. I am going to grill pool side one night. The kids love grilling. I have the slow cooker and contents for one night... and we have the blender with the pour spout for all the drinks we can enjoy....smoothies both under 21 usage and after bedtime over 21 usage... ;-)

Too much drama with my 16 year old this week and I followed through on my consequence for her which felt awful yet I am being told a few more times and things will get better. She pushes the limits and it bothers me that she sets herself up for heartaches but I can only guide her.. She was stating she doesn't want to live here any more, I have ruined her life etc. and the sad part of the entire drama is that Kaitlyn was right there and she doesn't understand so now when she gets frustrated she is saying "you ruined my life" "I don't want to live here anymore" I know she doesn't even know what she is saying.... it hurts that she has even experienced the words. This is where I wish we all had space because it is difficult to have personal time....grieving is part of living when you have children with disabilities they have to face as teens and being adopted has a set of grieving processes you go through ....Kirsten struggles and her birth family is here from New York. They hadn't contacted her for years and now want to call 9 to 20 times a day. They want her at the cousins birthday but didn't call her on hers, they want to have her up to their grandmas and she wants to go one minute and then the next she is angry and sets it up not to be able to go... She is at a stage of her own mental issues that she needs to use all her energy to stay on her own course and this makes it all much more difficult.

More than anything we need this get away.