Wednesday, December 22, 2010
facebook has many more photos
Since I have joined facebook and blogging it is easy for me to shoot a photo with my phone to show you projects the kids are doing verses on the camera and uploading a seperate time. If you join my facebook you will see the day to day activities easier in photos.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Now that I got that out of the way.................
Hi, Merry Christmas/Happy Birthday Baby Jesus.. Happy Holidays... I have many friends of varied beliefs so that is my politically correct Intro.
I must say that this is the first breath I have taken without lists around me, worry on my shoulders and stress surrounding me.
The holiday party was a success although many children were ill this year so the attendance was a bit low. We had extra food for sure. I was so busy I forgot to get baby Emma on Santa for a good shot to hang... I hope to get to the mall before he fly's off for the year. The kids enjoyed their time at the party. We are back to our holiday crafts. I am not feeling the feeling of holiday cheer, kinda floating from one issue to another inside my head, which is in a fog... Having an ear infection at fifty is annoying for sure. It doesn't hurt, just keeping me in a fog, like my head is in a fish bowl.
Keirsten informed me this week, we are not poor mom we are on a tight budget and you (me) screwed this month up pretty bad...LOL hate when the kids are right. She is 17 now and doing much better with a new meds mix.
Kaitlyn is 16 and was very cute at her annual physical when she was examined and did not feel her body should be invaded by her doctor. She actual fought his hands off her when he was trying to check her tummy .... then yep...a peek up top to be sure everything is growing correctly and she was upset her looked at "HE looked at my boobs mom".... LOL then came the conversation about her period and if she wanted to take the Depo shot to stop the bleeding.. yep yep yep stop my period until he said she would need to come every three months for a shot.. then it was No SHOTs No SHOTs... so we are holding off on that until next year.
Steven is Mohawk boy, he loves his hair cut in this style as it makes for conversation from many people out in the public. The attention is making Steven more confident. He is growing up fast, has his moments, although over all he is growing up to a nice young man.
Jordan is Jordan and very much mommas boy still. Some days it feels warm and fuzzy and other annoying and stressful. He is doing very well at school which is wonderful. He is picking up more and more as he calms in that setting. His wish for Christmas is the Lego's pirate ship and his dream to get on the Disney ship for a cruise to be with Capt Hook and Peter Pan.
Tressa rides on Jordan's dream telling everyone she wants to spend the day with Windy little John and I think the other little brother is Mathew maybe??? She knows..... well then she says Peter pan and Tinker Bell. She is struggling with her PWS fight OCD and most of the time is in control. The off moments well it is what it is.
Lucas is getting more Mobile, acting like a typical toddler, exploring his environment and testing everyone to be on their toes. He got away the other day while our home had two extra families staying and a one time incident where one families truck needed power boosted with a drop cord,,, front door propped open and whala.... Lucas was all over that opportunity. He is home safe and sound actually before the police got to the neighborhood he was already home, showered and eating. He is oblivious to the dangers in the neighborhood..... we live near many canals, lots and lots of water.
Emma is the cutiest little red head alive. She is a mommas girl although very happy to snuggle with several others as well but now with mommy the giggles melt my heart.
I must say that this is the first breath I have taken without lists around me, worry on my shoulders and stress surrounding me.
The holiday party was a success although many children were ill this year so the attendance was a bit low. We had extra food for sure. I was so busy I forgot to get baby Emma on Santa for a good shot to hang... I hope to get to the mall before he fly's off for the year. The kids enjoyed their time at the party. We are back to our holiday crafts. I am not feeling the feeling of holiday cheer, kinda floating from one issue to another inside my head, which is in a fog... Having an ear infection at fifty is annoying for sure. It doesn't hurt, just keeping me in a fog, like my head is in a fish bowl.
Keirsten informed me this week, we are not poor mom we are on a tight budget and you (me) screwed this month up pretty bad...LOL hate when the kids are right. She is 17 now and doing much better with a new meds mix.
Kaitlyn is 16 and was very cute at her annual physical when she was examined and did not feel her body should be invaded by her doctor. She actual fought his hands off her when he was trying to check her tummy .... then yep...a peek up top to be sure everything is growing correctly and she was upset her looked at "HE looked at my boobs mom".... LOL then came the conversation about her period and if she wanted to take the Depo shot to stop the bleeding.. yep yep yep stop my period until he said she would need to come every three months for a shot.. then it was No SHOTs No SHOTs... so we are holding off on that until next year.
Steven is Mohawk boy, he loves his hair cut in this style as it makes for conversation from many people out in the public. The attention is making Steven more confident. He is growing up fast, has his moments, although over all he is growing up to a nice young man.
Jordan is Jordan and very much mommas boy still. Some days it feels warm and fuzzy and other annoying and stressful. He is doing very well at school which is wonderful. He is picking up more and more as he calms in that setting. His wish for Christmas is the Lego's pirate ship and his dream to get on the Disney ship for a cruise to be with Capt Hook and Peter Pan.
Tressa rides on Jordan's dream telling everyone she wants to spend the day with Windy little John and I think the other little brother is Mathew maybe??? She knows..... well then she says Peter pan and Tinker Bell. She is struggling with her PWS fight OCD and most of the time is in control. The off moments well it is what it is.
Lucas is getting more Mobile, acting like a typical toddler, exploring his environment and testing everyone to be on their toes. He got away the other day while our home had two extra families staying and a one time incident where one families truck needed power boosted with a drop cord,,, front door propped open and whala.... Lucas was all over that opportunity. He is home safe and sound actually before the police got to the neighborhood he was already home, showered and eating. He is oblivious to the dangers in the neighborhood..... we live near many canals, lots and lots of water.
Emma is the cutiest little red head alive. She is a mommas girl although very happy to snuggle with several others as well but now with mommy the giggles melt my heart.
My problem with blogging is that I was raised if you do not have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.... I am sure I have lots to say nice but lately when something starts out nice it tends to turn not so nice and I for whatever reason am struggling with the whole life just isn't fair..... and I know as a mom I should be able to swallow it to understand everything in life isn't fair although as an adult I want to be a part of making it fair although changing life's history seems a tad bit out of my league of advocacy. Although knowing me I am going to take the hard road and try... where is my head...it is out there...
#1 I have had an ear infection double and feeling miserable although without health insurance I will hold out to every home remedy and many times send myself deeper in pain, who knows what medically I risk but without health insurance it is what it is... some say go to ER for everything, my credit report says that is not a good plan, My brain goes to why does my ex have quality health care paid by tax payers while residing in prison for committing a crime unspeakable..... yet I adopt 9 children all having special needs give up my career, devote my life to the welfare of children and I can not get antibiotics... well I can but I do not QUALIFY for any help so I would have to fit it into the budget...
Then we QUALIFY for nothing, really nothing.... absolutely nothing.... I hear our country did a energy program and to QUALIFY for the perk you have to be elderly, disabled or have a child under the age of 5 years old...I am a shoe in 7 children disabled, one under 1 to boot..... shoe in...NOPE we do not QUALIFY. I know I should be thrilled that our income doesn't QUALIFY us but when you sit in a lobby where every woman has her nails done, hair tied twisted, highlighted fresh cuts and fashion clothes with crystal clean new shoes... with some average cars I wonder..... when they figure the income to QUALIFY do they understand that with 7 children who are disabled I replace the average toilet way more often than the average household, I drive a van that takes 10X more to run, more windows are broken from fly away baseballs, holes repaired..oh refrigerators wear out or stoves get broken more often than the average household.... how about all the doctors appointments hotels for out of town medical needs, hey the fact it is two hotel rooms not one.... but where does that play into the equation.... because we just do not QUALIFY... ''Here is my grip...
A person on SSI receiving 674.00 a month gets additional $180.00 for food... for one person. but because I have more than one... they get nothing because they do not QUALIFY... not that I want food stamps but please if there is some energy credit...for a person with disabilities...toss the perk out where it makes sense... no I do not lie, I will not babysit and not report it, I do not sell any drugs or work under the table and if I earned any income I would report it and do.... so I do not get my nails done any longer, I am in need of a hair cut, I am without medical care and we do save every bit we can by cutting each and every corner possible... who gets a new refrigerator delivered in hours for $20.00 a person who works her budget to the penny..... My house is busting at the seams with kids toys, therapy equipment and kids clothes.... My life is providing for their needs... we are not NEEDING for anything but ghee it would have been nice to have that little extra because we QUALIFIED for a little perk.....
#1 I have had an ear infection double and feeling miserable although without health insurance I will hold out to every home remedy and many times send myself deeper in pain, who knows what medically I risk but without health insurance it is what it is... some say go to ER for everything, my credit report says that is not a good plan, My brain goes to why does my ex have quality health care paid by tax payers while residing in prison for committing a crime unspeakable..... yet I adopt 9 children all having special needs give up my career, devote my life to the welfare of children and I can not get antibiotics... well I can but I do not QUALIFY for any help so I would have to fit it into the budget...
Then we QUALIFY for nothing, really nothing.... absolutely nothing.... I hear our country did a energy program and to QUALIFY for the perk you have to be elderly, disabled or have a child under the age of 5 years old...I am a shoe in 7 children disabled, one under 1 to boot..... shoe in...NOPE we do not QUALIFY. I know I should be thrilled that our income doesn't QUALIFY us but when you sit in a lobby where every woman has her nails done, hair tied twisted, highlighted fresh cuts and fashion clothes with crystal clean new shoes... with some average cars I wonder..... when they figure the income to QUALIFY do they understand that with 7 children who are disabled I replace the average toilet way more often than the average household, I drive a van that takes 10X more to run, more windows are broken from fly away baseballs, holes repaired..oh refrigerators wear out or stoves get broken more often than the average household.... how about all the doctors appointments hotels for out of town medical needs, hey the fact it is two hotel rooms not one.... but where does that play into the equation.... because we just do not QUALIFY... ''Here is my grip...
A person on SSI receiving 674.00 a month gets additional $180.00 for food... for one person. but because I have more than one... they get nothing because they do not QUALIFY... not that I want food stamps but please if there is some energy credit...for a person with disabilities...toss the perk out where it makes sense... no I do not lie, I will not babysit and not report it, I do not sell any drugs or work under the table and if I earned any income I would report it and do.... so I do not get my nails done any longer, I am in need of a hair cut, I am without medical care and we do save every bit we can by cutting each and every corner possible... who gets a new refrigerator delivered in hours for $20.00 a person who works her budget to the penny..... My house is busting at the seams with kids toys, therapy equipment and kids clothes.... My life is providing for their needs... we are not NEEDING for anything but ghee it would have been nice to have that little extra because we QUALIFIED for a little perk.....
Saturday, December 11, 2010
I have no clue how you moms of two year olds blog, I have NO TIME..... She is into everything if I am not one on one doing things with her and then she takes a nap, I do the household items I use to do when she sat and played solo. NOW, I barely get a handle on those items and she is up from her nap.... I then use to get to have my personal time at 8 pm.... until 11ish. Well since she rested for two hours she feels she is entitled to her time after 8pm.... So here I am with this bright eyes little fire cracker ready for mom and her time and she would very much like to take over this lap top for her time with Sarah Grace...... Ok, I need to get off before she rips my arm off so if I get her off to sleep and have time outside my me time, I will be back on....... HOW DO YOU MOMS DO THIS?????????????????????
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Happy Holidays to all.
Bless me followers for I have not posted, it has been 2 months since my last post.
I have not been too busy nor lacking blog comic material. i have been living with out a lap top or computer in the house. I have had my Palm Pre which if you have one know that the max is getting things uploaded on facebook. Spelling is not corrected, many times words I thought I printed came through totally different.
So today as I am in a slump am here to catch you all up.... since October 5th 2010.... Lucas is now 7 WOW is right, Tressa turned 9, Mandie turned 32 and is not in her last month of pregnancy, Thanksgiving came and went with us boycotting in a sense because we were all going to be together today (Mandie's baby shower..). I tend to take the hard road in learning life lessons...never boycott Thanksgiving. CHECK.... ingrained into my memory forever.
I am in last of the planning for the annual Holiday party, following an awareness walk which was in line with the economy... not enough funding to throw a Holiday party.. $725.00 hall, $300.00 food, $230.00 table dressings, $150.00 centerpieces, $75.00 printing, and all the little things that make it magical... not including the $20.00 per child gift and $5.00 per family package..... $1,500.00 seems like min. to raise to make a stress free party which s so magical I am addicted to throwing it each year.. BUT as I mentioned the economy has take a dive to the point we are getting little funds... The Hall is paid, a family is donating food.... we are trying to be super creative, BUT it is what it is.. I look at the 200 people coming who will have a magical stress free night bonding with families just like theirs, making family to family support connections that will last long after the close of this event... No one can help a mom who is having struggles than a mom who is also raising a child with disabilities. We are a special breed. Our children have shown us a love others can not see or understand... our sense of humor is most often of a different level than the norm... we are just enough different to understand each other..
Let me catch up the families I serve....
Keirsten is turning 17 in a few days.... SCARY as her mom to know she can and most likely will walk out my front door to be "on her own" before long. I completely see she is not at all prepared for this move. She on the other hand has planned to save $200.00 to get her own apartment, not to mention the electric, cable, cell phone...hoping that water is included. Yes that was not a typo...she is planning all of this with $200.00 she hopes to save in the year. I on the other hand have her pre-registered to start at High Tech North which she will dual enroll into starting January in their cosmetology classes and continue in High School. In one year she will have a certificate to cut hair and have her test to give her a High School equivalency which in her graduating year she will walk as a graduate... That is my plan, maybe just as stretched although I am praying I have the better plan and in some odd way it will all fall into place. If all falls apart, I am in need of medication for the first time in my life.
Kaitlyn is making great progress in reading. She is now at or above the 3.0 reading level and getting better. She loves to read, the world opens for those who love to read. The reason this is so important is that when you have a child reading at the 3.0 level heading into High School planning is critical. Is it still important to keep her in general education classes where reading will be laid on the back burner. Is reading so important that she misses out on the electives we all can remember, baking those cookies in home ec. Making the album cover in art class... Having those partners in group activities which built friendships and fond memories. I am going to see schools and classes to make my final decision. She is her sweet self with the spike of wanting to be my roommate and not daughter.... you know she is a teenager. "I am 16 years old MOM" is her favorite saying to me these days.
Steven is doing Ok in his educational setting although A+ in social growth. He can move those finger skate boards like non other. He can maneuver campus like it is his back yard. He is speaking before being spoken to or ordered to speak... He is actually being groomed to be the first in his district to be a student led IEP... I am excited for spring when this will occur. Steven is having a terrible time with a rash that has been called ring worm but I am not convinced... it is "odd" so I am sure we are heading to a specialist..
Jordan...well it was a rough day so lets pass over that bundle of energy so I do not say anything I may regret...LOL
Tressa spent time with her previous speech teacher today at Mandie's shower and she was lovin the time. Tressa loves girl time, social time, time to have attention with adults. she is a hugger, a loving little girl. She is not the physical go getter so she requires a push every now and again.
Lucas ................. I will complete later.
I have not been too busy nor lacking blog comic material. i have been living with out a lap top or computer in the house. I have had my Palm Pre which if you have one know that the max is getting things uploaded on facebook. Spelling is not corrected, many times words I thought I printed came through totally different.
So today as I am in a slump am here to catch you all up.... since October 5th 2010.... Lucas is now 7 WOW is right, Tressa turned 9, Mandie turned 32 and is not in her last month of pregnancy, Thanksgiving came and went with us boycotting in a sense because we were all going to be together today (Mandie's baby shower..). I tend to take the hard road in learning life lessons...never boycott Thanksgiving. CHECK.... ingrained into my memory forever.
I am in last of the planning for the annual Holiday party, following an awareness walk which was in line with the economy... not enough funding to throw a Holiday party.. $725.00 hall, $300.00 food, $230.00 table dressings, $150.00 centerpieces, $75.00 printing, and all the little things that make it magical... not including the $20.00 per child gift and $5.00 per family package..... $1,500.00 seems like min. to raise to make a stress free party which s so magical I am addicted to throwing it each year.. BUT as I mentioned the economy has take a dive to the point we are getting little funds... The Hall is paid, a family is donating food.... we are trying to be super creative, BUT it is what it is.. I look at the 200 people coming who will have a magical stress free night bonding with families just like theirs, making family to family support connections that will last long after the close of this event... No one can help a mom who is having struggles than a mom who is also raising a child with disabilities. We are a special breed. Our children have shown us a love others can not see or understand... our sense of humor is most often of a different level than the norm... we are just enough different to understand each other..
Let me catch up the families I serve....
Keirsten is turning 17 in a few days.... SCARY as her mom to know she can and most likely will walk out my front door to be "on her own" before long. I completely see she is not at all prepared for this move. She on the other hand has planned to save $200.00 to get her own apartment, not to mention the electric, cable, cell phone...hoping that water is included. Yes that was not a typo...she is planning all of this with $200.00 she hopes to save in the year. I on the other hand have her pre-registered to start at High Tech North which she will dual enroll into starting January in their cosmetology classes and continue in High School. In one year she will have a certificate to cut hair and have her test to give her a High School equivalency which in her graduating year she will walk as a graduate... That is my plan, maybe just as stretched although I am praying I have the better plan and in some odd way it will all fall into place. If all falls apart, I am in need of medication for the first time in my life.
Kaitlyn is making great progress in reading. She is now at or above the 3.0 reading level and getting better. She loves to read, the world opens for those who love to read. The reason this is so important is that when you have a child reading at the 3.0 level heading into High School planning is critical. Is it still important to keep her in general education classes where reading will be laid on the back burner. Is reading so important that she misses out on the electives we all can remember, baking those cookies in home ec. Making the album cover in art class... Having those partners in group activities which built friendships and fond memories. I am going to see schools and classes to make my final decision. She is her sweet self with the spike of wanting to be my roommate and not daughter.... you know she is a teenager. "I am 16 years old MOM" is her favorite saying to me these days.
Steven is doing Ok in his educational setting although A+ in social growth. He can move those finger skate boards like non other. He can maneuver campus like it is his back yard. He is speaking before being spoken to or ordered to speak... He is actually being groomed to be the first in his district to be a student led IEP... I am excited for spring when this will occur. Steven is having a terrible time with a rash that has been called ring worm but I am not convinced... it is "odd" so I am sure we are heading to a specialist..
Jordan...well it was a rough day so lets pass over that bundle of energy so I do not say anything I may regret...LOL
Tressa spent time with her previous speech teacher today at Mandie's shower and she was lovin the time. Tressa loves girl time, social time, time to have attention with adults. she is a hugger, a loving little girl. She is not the physical go getter so she requires a push every now and again.
Lucas ................. I will complete later.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Sometimes parents of teens just gotta laugh
I need to share something very funny... well in my sick humor it is funny to me..
I am not sure you all know but I have in home therapy (mental health) in the home for my teen to deal with teen issues, the program is called TBOSS and please do not ask me what they stand for but it is described: for children and adolescents and their family who display a high frequency of disruptive and impulsive behaviors and serious emotional disturbances. TBOSS provides individualized therapeutic approach where the disruptive behavior occurs, allowing access to a child’s natural behaviors, environments and caregivers, including the home, school, and day care. Treatment focuses on peer interactions and socially acceptable behavior.
The person coming has a master level degree... So it has been the best material any stand up comedian could hope to have... seriously!
I have to share a piece because most is privileged personal I can not share because you know who I am talking about but this was way way too funny I just have to share...
In discussing career choices, planning for transition the plan has been what schooling to stick with, add to or plan for and when. I gave my points and needed to just listen after that... As the therapist explained the difference from getting a job with a high school diploma verses a career where you would have a 401K for retirement... He stops to be sure she is understanding the conversation... He asks her if she knows what a 401K is.... She responds quickly; "Yes I do" He asks will you explain what you know it to be... she says; "it is when you have kids" He explains it would be good to have a career and a 401K if you are having children yes but how does a 401K work for your financial future? She stated she learned it from the BMA's, he said oh, how might that be? she says; "Chelsea Handler taught me about 401K's" really? "Justin Beebers mom got her 401K the day he was born." "Chelsea Handler said so!" I KID YOU NOT..... I did not bust out laughing....He didn't know what to say to this and she went on to explain... so oh my goodness my daughter is getting her financial planning off the BMA's.... kinda matches her comment tonight...
She says to me; Mom my teacher said to me today I should be thankful I have good looks.... wasn't that nice...
Oh dear, oh dear......this being the child that now has to take her medications before she gets to put on her eye liner because the one thing she never forgets before school is her eye liner...which now is encased in an envelope that says...TAKE YOUR PILL BEFORE YOU APPLY EYE LINER! LOL
I am not sure you all know but I have in home therapy (mental health) in the home for my teen to deal with teen issues, the program is called TBOSS and please do not ask me what they stand for but it is described: for children and adolescents and their family who display a high frequency of disruptive and impulsive behaviors and serious emotional disturbances. TBOSS provides individualized therapeutic approach where the disruptive behavior occurs, allowing access to a child’s natural behaviors, environments and caregivers, including the home, school, and day care. Treatment focuses on peer interactions and socially acceptable behavior.
The person coming has a master level degree... So it has been the best material any stand up comedian could hope to have... seriously!
I have to share a piece because most is privileged personal I can not share because you know who I am talking about but this was way way too funny I just have to share...
In discussing career choices, planning for transition the plan has been what schooling to stick with, add to or plan for and when. I gave my points and needed to just listen after that... As the therapist explained the difference from getting a job with a high school diploma verses a career where you would have a 401K for retirement... He stops to be sure she is understanding the conversation... He asks her if she knows what a 401K is.... She responds quickly; "Yes I do" He asks will you explain what you know it to be... she says; "it is when you have kids" He explains it would be good to have a career and a 401K if you are having children yes but how does a 401K work for your financial future? She stated she learned it from the BMA's, he said oh, how might that be? she says; "Chelsea Handler taught me about 401K's" really? "Justin Beebers mom got her 401K the day he was born." "Chelsea Handler said so!" I KID YOU NOT..... I did not bust out laughing....He didn't know what to say to this and she went on to explain... so oh my goodness my daughter is getting her financial planning off the BMA's.... kinda matches her comment tonight...
She says to me; Mom my teacher said to me today I should be thankful I have good looks.... wasn't that nice...
Oh dear, oh dear......this being the child that now has to take her medications before she gets to put on her eye liner because the one thing she never forgets before school is her eye liner...which now is encased in an envelope that says...TAKE YOUR PILL BEFORE YOU APPLY EYE LINER! LOL
Finding balance and holding on to balance......Life
Some days for me are one moment at a time and balance in my life is critical for all the little people who count on me every moment of their lives so I have had to take a few days to recover from some emotional dealings.
First and foremost if any of my followers are or know of a family who has a child with PWS and are interested or licensed to adopt I really would like you to email me. My world was just turned upside down from a situation needing a family for a newborn with PWS. So if I know families it is easy for me to pass along your information.
Let me back up to two years ago..... The week before Emma was born our family was submitted to adopt a little girl with Down syndrome at that time just 6 years old. A sad situation and she ended up in foster care... as the process moved on our end dropped the ball because Emma's situation was presented and moved very fast where I was in NICU out of town; living a new mom role with a very sick baby girl. I did not return emails or phone calls about the 6 yr old for months... I felt she must have been provided a home, she is so darn cute. I checked on her in the spring and learned she is still sitting in foster care.... still waiting for her family. I contacted the agency again and they called to request our current home study..which then makes us go through the process.... we have a new child so a new home study ($$$).. we are approved to adopt and space was being made for her to come. Tressa had made room in her bedroom to add a new sister her age as the little girl is almost 8 now. We have had the home visits, paper work jumping hoops and meeting all the new critera of Adam Walsh clearences, FBI fingerprints on top of FDLE level 2 clearences etc to meet ICPC regulations... no problem I have never been in trouble with the law and believe I am very capable of bringing her into our home as it feels God has kept his hand on me to care for her...in his time it will happen.
Last week as I was interviening in a situation in Florida helping a family in crisis I get an email to help a new family in need of placing their baby into an adotpive home who has PWS and they are hoping to find a family involved in PWS and know adoption and care of children with PWS... I sent out emails/phone calls to families who had talked to me about their desire to adopt in the past with children who have PWS.. I got back email after email of denials for right now is not a good time... I talked to the parents on the phone and I questioned if this isn't a clear message that it is our family he needs... I move to make arrangements to say; what is one more? I contact our social worker and attorney to be sure I am not blocking the placement of our little 8 yr old who needs us and they say if I am sure I can do it they trust in my judgement, check on what supports do you have in place... I talk to my teens in the home and of course my household says YES to a new baby... We get the Baby bed set up, place all the little boy materials out and we are set for me to fly out to meet the baby... but something didn't feel right... something kept me from clicking the payment button and having the flight confirmed.. I prayed and prayed what is happening... I emailed, I befriended face book friends that I have never personally met but are support in the world of PWS... and I prayed for an answer.. everything is moving quickly as it does with newborn adoptions for special needs.. I need a commitment. I talk to the family again and their questions of me brought the light staight to the surface.. the vision of long term goals for all were made clear.. this is not the plan, I need to back out and let this family move to find peace in what they are doing and if adoption is the answer, is this right>>> not for our family... and I went through a brief grieving of loosing an adoption placement, packing up the baby's spot in our home. The support from my friends is immensely appreciated, the strength it took for me not to take on so much more than my family really could handle...
The Extreme Makeover we had been nominated with for Home Makeover has not been decided so we are in a home which is in need of space for adding another boy to our family. In the long term plan for our family who would take over if anything happened to me, one child with PWS is a huge responsibility and 2 is twice as much.. Would that person or persons be able to move into my home as it is..no...this house is fine for me right now, that is not good long term planning. No one else would allow three children in their bed..LOL (all the kids have their own bed, mine seems to be the preferred) So it is calm today, it will be more calm when the baby is either in his birth family making his spot as their son and their believing they can parent him or in an adoptive family and all calm in their choices.. That will be a glorious day... but today we are where we need to be and yes I do understand I can not save the world and I have done more than most which all makes total sense on an average day..... days where I stay balanced.
The days after, this another clear message I did the right thing... when Tressa(PWS) came to our home Jordan was 18 months...last week I thought this is a parallel placement to that, seemed to be following EXACT play out. Then yesterday at Emma's 18 month check up I was told she needs weight on, she has fallen off the charts so pediasure and cookie parties.... OH GREAT!!! This was the same as with Jordan...for years I had to have Jordan hide under my sheets before bed and load him with calories.. I so remember how unfair it felt..when I mentioned another baby with PWS to my Pediatrician he says "NO" LOL I must admit when I mention adoption to any one of my friends or family 80% say no, but they have been saying "NO" since Kaitlyn?? Steven?? Jordan?? Tressa?? Lucas?? Emma?? and what if I had listened to those "NO's"
Today I need to get busy on what is current, a Down syndrome awareness walk/park date which is overwhelmingly difficult to pull together in this economy... Only three of the almost forty families coming registered ($$$) so how do you throw a HUGE event with $150.00.... it isn't enough to order printing for registration forms let alone getting the T-shirts...so I have a lot of responsibility on my shoulders right now which I have to find balance... the balance is I am holding to my word! I am not taking from my family any longer to make Down syndrome events work out the way I envision...they will be what they are for what is provided from the local community of DS... Awareness and togetherness ... it is what it is.
I am moving forward with the little girl and hopefully before Christmas she will be in her Hanna Montana sheets Tressa picked out for her. We are always thinking of her... and how having a family, our family, her family, is going to bring closure to her life in the system.
Today is my day of rest, tomorrow is a busy day... Friday is prepare for the weekend, Saturday we have a picnic to attend and a parade at night, Sunday Tressa and I prepare to go to Gainesville for her visit to PWS clinic with Dr Miller and the following weekend is Florida PWS Conference where we will be surrounded with friends in Orlando having FUN FUN FUN... so I can look forward to so much and celebrate all we have and not think about all that we don't.. We have the most important life asset, love..and one another. LUCAS will be SEVEN on the 13th... unbelievable!!! We have so much to celebrate.
First and foremost if any of my followers are or know of a family who has a child with PWS and are interested or licensed to adopt I really would like you to email me. My world was just turned upside down from a situation needing a family for a newborn with PWS. So if I know families it is easy for me to pass along your information.
Let me back up to two years ago..... The week before Emma was born our family was submitted to adopt a little girl with Down syndrome at that time just 6 years old. A sad situation and she ended up in foster care... as the process moved on our end dropped the ball because Emma's situation was presented and moved very fast where I was in NICU out of town; living a new mom role with a very sick baby girl. I did not return emails or phone calls about the 6 yr old for months... I felt she must have been provided a home, she is so darn cute. I checked on her in the spring and learned she is still sitting in foster care.... still waiting for her family. I contacted the agency again and they called to request our current home study..which then makes us go through the process.... we have a new child so a new home study ($$$).. we are approved to adopt and space was being made for her to come. Tressa had made room in her bedroom to add a new sister her age as the little girl is almost 8 now. We have had the home visits, paper work jumping hoops and meeting all the new critera of Adam Walsh clearences, FBI fingerprints on top of FDLE level 2 clearences etc to meet ICPC regulations... no problem I have never been in trouble with the law and believe I am very capable of bringing her into our home as it feels God has kept his hand on me to care for her...in his time it will happen.
Last week as I was interviening in a situation in Florida helping a family in crisis I get an email to help a new family in need of placing their baby into an adotpive home who has PWS and they are hoping to find a family involved in PWS and know adoption and care of children with PWS... I sent out emails/phone calls to families who had talked to me about their desire to adopt in the past with children who have PWS.. I got back email after email of denials for right now is not a good time... I talked to the parents on the phone and I questioned if this isn't a clear message that it is our family he needs... I move to make arrangements to say; what is one more? I contact our social worker and attorney to be sure I am not blocking the placement of our little 8 yr old who needs us and they say if I am sure I can do it they trust in my judgement, check on what supports do you have in place... I talk to my teens in the home and of course my household says YES to a new baby... We get the Baby bed set up, place all the little boy materials out and we are set for me to fly out to meet the baby... but something didn't feel right... something kept me from clicking the payment button and having the flight confirmed.. I prayed and prayed what is happening... I emailed, I befriended face book friends that I have never personally met but are support in the world of PWS... and I prayed for an answer.. everything is moving quickly as it does with newborn adoptions for special needs.. I need a commitment. I talk to the family again and their questions of me brought the light staight to the surface.. the vision of long term goals for all were made clear.. this is not the plan, I need to back out and let this family move to find peace in what they are doing and if adoption is the answer, is this right>>> not for our family... and I went through a brief grieving of loosing an adoption placement, packing up the baby's spot in our home. The support from my friends is immensely appreciated, the strength it took for me not to take on so much more than my family really could handle...
The Extreme Makeover we had been nominated with for Home Makeover has not been decided so we are in a home which is in need of space for adding another boy to our family. In the long term plan for our family who would take over if anything happened to me, one child with PWS is a huge responsibility and 2 is twice as much.. Would that person or persons be able to move into my home as it is..no...this house is fine for me right now, that is not good long term planning. No one else would allow three children in their bed..LOL (all the kids have their own bed, mine seems to be the preferred) So it is calm today, it will be more calm when the baby is either in his birth family making his spot as their son and their believing they can parent him or in an adoptive family and all calm in their choices.. That will be a glorious day... but today we are where we need to be and yes I do understand I can not save the world and I have done more than most which all makes total sense on an average day..... days where I stay balanced.
The days after, this another clear message I did the right thing... when Tressa(PWS) came to our home Jordan was 18 months...last week I thought this is a parallel placement to that, seemed to be following EXACT play out. Then yesterday at Emma's 18 month check up I was told she needs weight on, she has fallen off the charts so pediasure and cookie parties.... OH GREAT!!! This was the same as with Jordan...for years I had to have Jordan hide under my sheets before bed and load him with calories.. I so remember how unfair it felt..when I mentioned another baby with PWS to my Pediatrician he says "NO" LOL I must admit when I mention adoption to any one of my friends or family 80% say no, but they have been saying "NO" since Kaitlyn?? Steven?? Jordan?? Tressa?? Lucas?? Emma?? and what if I had listened to those "NO's"
Today I need to get busy on what is current, a Down syndrome awareness walk/park date which is overwhelmingly difficult to pull together in this economy... Only three of the almost forty families coming registered ($$$) so how do you throw a HUGE event with $150.00.... it isn't enough to order printing for registration forms let alone getting the T-shirts...so I have a lot of responsibility on my shoulders right now which I have to find balance... the balance is I am holding to my word! I am not taking from my family any longer to make Down syndrome events work out the way I envision...they will be what they are for what is provided from the local community of DS... Awareness and togetherness ... it is what it is.
I am moving forward with the little girl and hopefully before Christmas she will be in her Hanna Montana sheets Tressa picked out for her. We are always thinking of her... and how having a family, our family, her family, is going to bring closure to her life in the system.
Today is my day of rest, tomorrow is a busy day... Friday is prepare for the weekend, Saturday we have a picnic to attend and a parade at night, Sunday Tressa and I prepare to go to Gainesville for her visit to PWS clinic with Dr Miller and the following weekend is Florida PWS Conference where we will be surrounded with friends in Orlando having FUN FUN FUN... so I can look forward to so much and celebrate all we have and not think about all that we don't.. We have the most important life asset, love..and one another. LUCAS will be SEVEN on the 13th... unbelievable!!! We have so much to celebrate.
Friday, October 1, 2010
quick update
It has been a bit of time since I last posted about us as a family. We are all doing fine, no illnesses other than the allergy spells and return to school colds. Nothing taking much more than the regular measures. We have some of the annual medicals coming up although I am not feeling anything major will come of this years trips. Everyone eating well, exercising for the most part and therapy has been regular and consistent. Remember I put something on facebook pretty much daily. For a quick, hey what are you up to it can be found there... and if someone could PLEASE help my Mother learn facebook, she is getting upset the world knows more than she does.
If anyone is interested and obviously lives local I will be having one maybe two positions open for employment in my home after the first of the year. This is a position that comes in and helps with the kids daily and some weekends, we can be adjustable to yours and mine needs.. State pays 9 to 10 an hour starting depending on what you are doing.. email me.
Keirsten is turning 17 and some balance is surfacing, she want to start vo-tech as she finishes high school so that when she graduates she will have a cosmetology licence and work in a high end salon. She is all about hair and make up. Then she can move on to college for more if she wishes. Florida gave her a free pass to college from her special needs adoption as part of their subsidy package. Yeah!
Kaitlyn is moving through the eighth grade excited to be going to High School next year. She talks about all the things she is going to do in High School. She is very interested in the marching band. She starts bowling tomorrow with Steven in the neighborhood typical league. She is very excited about that.
Steven is Steven lackadaisical care free and as long as he has a finger skate board near by with a pad and markers the boy is not seen or heard. The weather broke so swimming 24/7 for people who live here is a bit cold.
Jordan is having some meds changes for seizures right now so all extra eyes on side effects from that. We went to the Doctor yesterday. He got a huge compliment from the staff at Children's Medical Services on how well he listens and obeys. I had a couple moments I wasn't sure but hey if that's what they see, I knkow I am pretty tough on the kids to be respectful in public because like it or not eyes on on their behaviors. HE passed! GO Jordan... not to leave out Steven and Kaitlyn who waited nicely in the waiting room without any incidence so thumbs up there as well.
Tressa is having a rough couple of days, not sure what's up but she is wanting to be difficult at school and refuse to work, she does it fine here??? Usually it is opposite, I struggle to get her to do home work... so we are woking on a reward to see if TODAY can be a thumbs up day. I know this being her repeat year the teacher is extra demanding as she well should be so she is 100% ready for the third grade. She is going to see Dr. miller on the 11th to get her medical on track and get answers on the new findings in pws research.
Lucas is making strides in this new environment at school.. This year the focus is not academic although he gets some it is on feeding and toilet which feeding is coming along nicely.. the connection for toilet I am not sure is all connected yet so a mute point if he isn't registering the connections to his brain.. we will see, just getting started.
Emma is doing fantastic as long as you let her do it on Emma time. If you seek for her to play a game she will put her arm behind her back, if you ask her to babbble she pinches her lips closed.. if you leave her alone she crawls to the toy area chatters in the mirror plays with her toys and manuviers all that she was being asked to do yet refused.. I know she is stubborn... but so darn cute. Her orthodic shoes and braces are in and she is wearing them about an hour a day or a little longer, They are only use for her to stand or walk so when she is crawling and playing solo she doesn't need them on.
Ali, well I believe we are on the down side of chewing but I could be wrong. I am not ready to run out and get new lawn cousions yet.. She is SO big, so so big. No more "little puppy" THe kids love her and she is so wonderful with them.
If anyone is interested and obviously lives local I will be having one maybe two positions open for employment in my home after the first of the year. This is a position that comes in and helps with the kids daily and some weekends, we can be adjustable to yours and mine needs.. State pays 9 to 10 an hour starting depending on what you are doing.. email me.
Keirsten is turning 17 and some balance is surfacing, she want to start vo-tech as she finishes high school so that when she graduates she will have a cosmetology licence and work in a high end salon. She is all about hair and make up. Then she can move on to college for more if she wishes. Florida gave her a free pass to college from her special needs adoption as part of their subsidy package. Yeah!
Kaitlyn is moving through the eighth grade excited to be going to High School next year. She talks about all the things she is going to do in High School. She is very interested in the marching band. She starts bowling tomorrow with Steven in the neighborhood typical league. She is very excited about that.
Steven is Steven lackadaisical care free and as long as he has a finger skate board near by with a pad and markers the boy is not seen or heard. The weather broke so swimming 24/7 for people who live here is a bit cold.
Jordan is having some meds changes for seizures right now so all extra eyes on side effects from that. We went to the Doctor yesterday. He got a huge compliment from the staff at Children's Medical Services on how well he listens and obeys. I had a couple moments I wasn't sure but hey if that's what they see, I knkow I am pretty tough on the kids to be respectful in public because like it or not eyes on on their behaviors. HE passed! GO Jordan... not to leave out Steven and Kaitlyn who waited nicely in the waiting room without any incidence so thumbs up there as well.
Tressa is having a rough couple of days, not sure what's up but she is wanting to be difficult at school and refuse to work, she does it fine here??? Usually it is opposite, I struggle to get her to do home work... so we are woking on a reward to see if TODAY can be a thumbs up day. I know this being her repeat year the teacher is extra demanding as she well should be so she is 100% ready for the third grade. She is going to see Dr. miller on the 11th to get her medical on track and get answers on the new findings in pws research.
Lucas is making strides in this new environment at school.. This year the focus is not academic although he gets some it is on feeding and toilet which feeding is coming along nicely.. the connection for toilet I am not sure is all connected yet so a mute point if he isn't registering the connections to his brain.. we will see, just getting started.
Emma is doing fantastic as long as you let her do it on Emma time. If you seek for her to play a game she will put her arm behind her back, if you ask her to babbble she pinches her lips closed.. if you leave her alone she crawls to the toy area chatters in the mirror plays with her toys and manuviers all that she was being asked to do yet refused.. I know she is stubborn... but so darn cute. Her orthodic shoes and braces are in and she is wearing them about an hour a day or a little longer, They are only use for her to stand or walk so when she is crawling and playing solo she doesn't need them on.
Ali, well I believe we are on the down side of chewing but I could be wrong. I am not ready to run out and get new lawn cousions yet.. She is SO big, so so big. No more "little puppy" THe kids love her and she is so wonderful with them.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Parenting children with special needs offers special insight... as in the past couple of days. Like many homes when I go to the grocery store the kids find their favorite item and feel the need to eat/drink it up, open and use as fast as humanly possible. I am working on pace, pace the race to finish with common sense... DO not drink such a huge glass of orange juice so we have more for tomorrow. This I feel like I preach on every item, crayons to orange juice.
This morning Kaitlyn yells out to me: "YOU LIED TO ME" I said Kaitlyn what did I lie to you about? "THERE IS NO MORE ORANGE JUICE" as she is waving the empty carton in the air, you told me a lie mom..... so I reflect back to yesterday...lol well I did tell her lets not drink it all today so we will have some tomorrow.
She walks away from me and says "I am so frustrated with you right now mom"
I do not respond but reflect to all the years of speech therapy paying off, I fought so hard for so many hours, pushed for in home. I did good by her! LOL I brought this on myself, I must say fighting for inclusion and all the services possible really does give them the best opportunity to be more normal than not!
This morning Kaitlyn yells out to me: "YOU LIED TO ME" I said Kaitlyn what did I lie to you about? "THERE IS NO MORE ORANGE JUICE" as she is waving the empty carton in the air, you told me a lie mom..... so I reflect back to yesterday...lol well I did tell her lets not drink it all today so we will have some tomorrow.
She walks away from me and says "I am so frustrated with you right now mom"
I do not respond but reflect to all the years of speech therapy paying off, I fought so hard for so many hours, pushed for in home. I did good by her! LOL I brought this on myself, I must say fighting for inclusion and all the services possible really does give them the best opportunity to be more normal than not!
Monday, September 13, 2010
It is the eve of my 50th Year since birth...
I remember turning 25 years old and having a rough go of it. Feeling I was so old and had nothing to show for 25 years of life. Back then I looked at material things as wealth, that if I was still in college, hadn't bought a real solid home and made roots... OK, I bought a couple trailers by then but to me that didn't count. I was taken into a depression I didn't share with anyone. The good part of me is that I can kick myself harder than anyone else. When I got that kick, I moved forward. Back 25 years ago I was conflicted in faith, I was young, three small children, a dead beat man dragging me by my shirt tails and I needed a good hard kick. I had been to college many years by this time spinning from one direction to the other not understanding why my life remained so out of control when in my vision I was doing everything to rise above..
In my 27th year of life yes, I am slow at moving forward yet moving forward always... I sought out Catholic Social services in Peoria, Illinois where I met with a personal therapist and poured my heart out for me, not because someone told me to go, not because I was made to go, because I chose to go... I remember a heavy burden lifted off my shoulders that moment I went through that door even before I exposed my soul to this stranger. I knew that I had aloud my savior the one I believe in to have hold of my heart, take me where ever I needed to be to have a better life. I knew this did not mean any more college, I knew it had nothing to do with finding the right man, it had to do with my belief system, me, who I am and what I am about. I needed to put faith back into my life. This never has meant that I needed to belong to a building a church because I knew from the power inside me that I was connected personally which had nothing to do with other humans or any building nor group. SO I took the biggest leap of faith and left my core.my life as I knew it and traveled as far away as one could (almost) and here I am
almost 25 more years have passed and not one of those feelings of not good enough, not having enough, not doing enough are within me. I live each day with faith filled love within myself, it pours out to the people around me that choose to invite that part of who they are in. I do not get stuck on those who choose not to, I know they have their own journey to bare. This is me, it is who I am and I am 50 years of life proud. Could I have done more, been more, had more....who cares because more does not bring happiness if it not meant to be... For me happiness is more.
In my 27th year of life yes, I am slow at moving forward yet moving forward always... I sought out Catholic Social services in Peoria, Illinois where I met with a personal therapist and poured my heart out for me, not because someone told me to go, not because I was made to go, because I chose to go... I remember a heavy burden lifted off my shoulders that moment I went through that door even before I exposed my soul to this stranger. I knew that I had aloud my savior the one I believe in to have hold of my heart, take me where ever I needed to be to have a better life. I knew this did not mean any more college, I knew it had nothing to do with finding the right man, it had to do with my belief system, me, who I am and what I am about. I needed to put faith back into my life. This never has meant that I needed to belong to a building a church because I knew from the power inside me that I was connected personally which had nothing to do with other humans or any building nor group. SO I took the biggest leap of faith and left my core.my life as I knew it and traveled as far away as one could (almost) and here I am
almost 25 more years have passed and not one of those feelings of not good enough, not having enough, not doing enough are within me. I live each day with faith filled love within myself, it pours out to the people around me that choose to invite that part of who they are in. I do not get stuck on those who choose not to, I know they have their own journey to bare. This is me, it is who I am and I am 50 years of life proud. Could I have done more, been more, had more....who cares because more does not bring happiness if it not meant to be... For me happiness is more.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Birthday week begins...smiles upon my face
As I approach my 50th I have many memories and worries at the same time. Am I really that old? It seemed as I was growing up 50 was the end, rocking chairs for ever after. Now, I find it wow 50 is the beginning of so much fun, knowledge, making sound good choices to help make life better every day. I take each day as it comes not expecting anything more than to make the best of today, I love the journey I am on with my children, it brings me such joy.
This week starts out with my finances getting back into balance.. if you follow our family you will know that back in April I got notices that State Farm was letting our home go as of 2011 we will be dropped because we live in Florida... DROPPED after 20 years of honest faithful clients not claiming small things that could have been claimed.. Dropped, AND they raised my final year rate by DOUBLE... yes they did!!! It took my mortgage up $400.00 a month which when your actual mtg is $300.00 and add taxes and insurance near $700.00 and jump to $1,1000.00 it is HUGE as we hit the summer months I thought it would paralyze us from any fun money. The reason I am able to budget the family and have the little fun times is because we do have a mtg at 4% , monthly rate is $300.oo. We do not qualify for things like food stamps, free lunch programs etc so I have the balance of our expenses on our monthly income.. When you add $400.00 more a month as I move into $455.00 electric bills from the winter months of $225.00 I NEED PLANNING. They gave no for warning, just bam!
THE GOOD NEWS IS..... I ordered a wind mitigation report and my mortgage is being re calculated as of yesterday which they assured be will be back in the 600 range...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! I plan to take the over paid and get #1 a physical, #2 eye exam and new glasses.... again HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
At this time my friend canceled her room at the Hard Rock Hotel because she picked up a new job, Booo Hoooo I was looking forward to that. I have my cruise coming which is pre-paid so nothing is stopping me on that week of me me me time. If anyone reading would like to go, I found a week cruise on Carnival for $169.00. I have it pre-paid and pre-paid gratuity paid. I want to pre- pay one shore side excursion this month and the rest is on board fun.. I have my thrifty tricks I will share privately....LOL
It is Saturday morning all the kids are taking a calm morning watching cartoons, playing in their rooms and then Jordan who is calling his "Dad" He picked up the play phone and called "Steve, my Dad" He is going to his Dad's for the weekend and asked if he could take Ali with him too. I asked him what they were going to do and he said "make eggs" Not sure where this came from. Last night he asked if Lilly could come over and spend the night. Lilly his little friend from school he now knows he can only kiss on the cheek. LOL "R-E" as he calls her. He was not happy when I told him it would not be appropriate for her to spend the night with him but a play date is great. He is a riot, never know what is swirling in his head.
Tressa is having a rough morning, already planning snack and wanting to know if she can make ham and cheese little sandwiches for snack??? Then went through the entire list of anyone in the cafeteria who brought their lunch and told me everything that was inside their lunch box... She stated the very best item any one brought was a kit to make peanut butter and jelly crackers in a lunchable ...I have a feeling there is a candy bar in those lunchables... Hhhhmmmm... she didn't mention that. Hanna Montana movie tonight trying to re-focus her thoughts to planning for that. Tomorrow Lara is coming for the day so she will be busy with Lara and playing with her playhouse, dress up and girly girl day... She had Geraldine over the other day and that went well other than having children who are only kids...it is hard for them to understand that when they come out to play in the main rooms that other children will join in. She did take the explanation why others needed to be aloud to join if out in the main rooms and we must be nice... Went well.
I hope to get to the dollar store for Disney goodies. We go to DISNEY ON ICE Friday night. A very nice couple bought the family tickets to see DISNEY on Ice and added extra tickets so that the kids could all take a friend...Asked how many I could bring and my van holds 15 so 15 is what they sent!! AMAZING how generous people are. We leave at 4:30, pick up happy meals and put a movie on in the van DISNEY of course and off we go to the 7 pm show in Sunrise, FL. TO save on crying I am getting lots of trinkets to place in their hands during the show so they will not ask for the over priced items in the halls on the way in/out.. avoiding melt downs always.
School has been going better so not complaining too much right now. Jordan and Tressa are in great places. Lucas is having the trials of a new school where he is testing them to believe he can not do this, can not do that, he is taking the shoes off again, squeaking and popping his mouth noises much more.... URG why do our kids push all the buttons. His feeding is out of control. he now will not place anything non preferred into his mouth so I am being asked to come in and show how we do it here. URg... His no preferred is anything not yogurt, applesauce or pudding. Everything else is hand over hand to get him started and anything like a "bite" of a sandwich, pizza, chicken etc you have to really encourage him.. He wants to live on liquid.
Kaitlyn has been sick most of the first weeks of school and Steven's teacher called to say they are going to work on sounds of the alphabets.. some site words.. he was reading .7 books so not sure why we are plunging back to pre-K with a 13 year old in the 7th grade. I do I really Do because Steven is paving the way to show me exactly how smart my boys who choose not to do anything are. Steven has perfected the I will show the world I can not do anything... He speaks the most clear of all my children, he just chooses to speak to a small select few people in life... He avoids work at all costs.
This is it, doors are banging, I need to hop off here and have my presence known... Therapy in a few hours, Mandie is coming and swimming today.
This week starts out with my finances getting back into balance.. if you follow our family you will know that back in April I got notices that State Farm was letting our home go as of 2011 we will be dropped because we live in Florida... DROPPED after 20 years of honest faithful clients not claiming small things that could have been claimed.. Dropped, AND they raised my final year rate by DOUBLE... yes they did!!! It took my mortgage up $400.00 a month which when your actual mtg is $300.00 and add taxes and insurance near $700.00 and jump to $1,1000.00 it is HUGE as we hit the summer months I thought it would paralyze us from any fun money. The reason I am able to budget the family and have the little fun times is because we do have a mtg at 4% , monthly rate is $300.oo. We do not qualify for things like food stamps, free lunch programs etc so I have the balance of our expenses on our monthly income.. When you add $400.00 more a month as I move into $455.00 electric bills from the winter months of $225.00 I NEED PLANNING. They gave no for warning, just bam!
THE GOOD NEWS IS..... I ordered a wind mitigation report and my mortgage is being re calculated as of yesterday which they assured be will be back in the 600 range...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! I plan to take the over paid and get #1 a physical, #2 eye exam and new glasses.... again HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
At this time my friend canceled her room at the Hard Rock Hotel because she picked up a new job, Booo Hoooo I was looking forward to that. I have my cruise coming which is pre-paid so nothing is stopping me on that week of me me me time. If anyone reading would like to go, I found a week cruise on Carnival for $169.00. I have it pre-paid and pre-paid gratuity paid. I want to pre- pay one shore side excursion this month and the rest is on board fun.. I have my thrifty tricks I will share privately....LOL
It is Saturday morning all the kids are taking a calm morning watching cartoons, playing in their rooms and then Jordan who is calling his "Dad" He picked up the play phone and called "Steve, my Dad" He is going to his Dad's for the weekend and asked if he could take Ali with him too. I asked him what they were going to do and he said "make eggs" Not sure where this came from. Last night he asked if Lilly could come over and spend the night. Lilly his little friend from school he now knows he can only kiss on the cheek. LOL "R-E" as he calls her. He was not happy when I told him it would not be appropriate for her to spend the night with him but a play date is great. He is a riot, never know what is swirling in his head.
Tressa is having a rough morning, already planning snack and wanting to know if she can make ham and cheese little sandwiches for snack??? Then went through the entire list of anyone in the cafeteria who brought their lunch and told me everything that was inside their lunch box... She stated the very best item any one brought was a kit to make peanut butter and jelly crackers in a lunchable ...I have a feeling there is a candy bar in those lunchables... Hhhhmmmm... she didn't mention that. Hanna Montana movie tonight trying to re-focus her thoughts to planning for that. Tomorrow Lara is coming for the day so she will be busy with Lara and playing with her playhouse, dress up and girly girl day... She had Geraldine over the other day and that went well other than having children who are only kids...it is hard for them to understand that when they come out to play in the main rooms that other children will join in. She did take the explanation why others needed to be aloud to join if out in the main rooms and we must be nice... Went well.
I hope to get to the dollar store for Disney goodies. We go to DISNEY ON ICE Friday night. A very nice couple bought the family tickets to see DISNEY on Ice and added extra tickets so that the kids could all take a friend...Asked how many I could bring and my van holds 15 so 15 is what they sent!! AMAZING how generous people are. We leave at 4:30, pick up happy meals and put a movie on in the van DISNEY of course and off we go to the 7 pm show in Sunrise, FL. TO save on crying I am getting lots of trinkets to place in their hands during the show so they will not ask for the over priced items in the halls on the way in/out.. avoiding melt downs always.
School has been going better so not complaining too much right now. Jordan and Tressa are in great places. Lucas is having the trials of a new school where he is testing them to believe he can not do this, can not do that, he is taking the shoes off again, squeaking and popping his mouth noises much more.... URG why do our kids push all the buttons. His feeding is out of control. he now will not place anything non preferred into his mouth so I am being asked to come in and show how we do it here. URg... His no preferred is anything not yogurt, applesauce or pudding. Everything else is hand over hand to get him started and anything like a "bite" of a sandwich, pizza, chicken etc you have to really encourage him.. He wants to live on liquid.
Kaitlyn has been sick most of the first weeks of school and Steven's teacher called to say they are going to work on sounds of the alphabets.. some site words.. he was reading .7 books so not sure why we are plunging back to pre-K with a 13 year old in the 7th grade. I do I really Do because Steven is paving the way to show me exactly how smart my boys who choose not to do anything are. Steven has perfected the I will show the world I can not do anything... He speaks the most clear of all my children, he just chooses to speak to a small select few people in life... He avoids work at all costs.
This is it, doors are banging, I need to hop off here and have my presence known... Therapy in a few hours, Mandie is coming and swimming today.
Friday, September 10, 2010
venting
It has been a rough week, I am getting to a point where all the volunteering I do is interfering with my happiness at times. It isn't all warm and fuzzy which bothers me until the phone rings and someone needs to pick my brain... like yesterday a parent called because her child was having to walk down around the corner a few blocks to catch his ESE bus which passes their home to go to the next stop (someone Else's home) I helped her get the contacts to straighten it out for door to door pick up and drop off with helping her know what to put on the IEP so she can open the door and be sure an adult is home before he exits the bus for all the what if's. Pretty simple stuff if you know who, where and how to make contacts. This mom was stressing over weather, safe drop offs and all the what if's for no reason.
This morning a school called me to ask where they might find after school care for a child with special needs since the ones the parent is contacting are not taking children with special needs... FIRED ME RIGHT UP! This is my background.. Early childhood education, so I get on the phone and alert our 4C's this is an issue again, then the coalition to give them a heads up that we need inclusion help again and off to send an email to the school with names, addresses and contact numbers to pass along to parents...email out to a service provider about the ongoing need for after school care for children with special needs.. I have my wishes. We have a beautiful full service youth center being taken over by gangs and thugs which is a shame. We could use that facility for so many positive supports and services making the benefactor (deceased police officer) smile from his grave... I think it is time to plan a trip to a city board meeting and get the idea out to the community. I would love a night video of the facility as it is now.... Maybe a list of police calls/responds to that facility would be nice for public awareness... fire me up!
Then it is my passion for Down syndrome awareness and the endless hours I spend working to get volunteers to help.. to get things happening... and to get nasty emails, nasty phone calls that it is never enough... I take my volunteer positions seriously with many times my hands tied behind my back.. I am not one to ask for money, not good about charging for things most people charge big bucks for... my time is equally as valuable as others.. I often wish I could be on the "wife swap" in a people swap..... I have done a load of dishes six large loads of laundry, Gotten 7 kids up, fed dressed lunches, teeth brushed, deodorant on etc...hair etc... baby up bathes changed fed twice counseled a parent, coffee with a friend emailed the school made 14 Doctors appointments for my children, tried to hook up a printer, cleaned the house bleached the kids bathroom, and it is noon..... That all this morning. And I have volunteer work to get to now and why do I not feel like jumping right on that ??????????????????????????????????
This morning a school called me to ask where they might find after school care for a child with special needs since the ones the parent is contacting are not taking children with special needs... FIRED ME RIGHT UP! This is my background.. Early childhood education, so I get on the phone and alert our 4C's this is an issue again, then the coalition to give them a heads up that we need inclusion help again and off to send an email to the school with names, addresses and contact numbers to pass along to parents...email out to a service provider about the ongoing need for after school care for children with special needs.. I have my wishes. We have a beautiful full service youth center being taken over by gangs and thugs which is a shame. We could use that facility for so many positive supports and services making the benefactor (deceased police officer) smile from his grave... I think it is time to plan a trip to a city board meeting and get the idea out to the community. I would love a night video of the facility as it is now.... Maybe a list of police calls/responds to that facility would be nice for public awareness... fire me up!
Then it is my passion for Down syndrome awareness and the endless hours I spend working to get volunteers to help.. to get things happening... and to get nasty emails, nasty phone calls that it is never enough... I take my volunteer positions seriously with many times my hands tied behind my back.. I am not one to ask for money, not good about charging for things most people charge big bucks for... my time is equally as valuable as others.. I often wish I could be on the "wife swap" in a people swap..... I have done a load of dishes six large loads of laundry, Gotten 7 kids up, fed dressed lunches, teeth brushed, deodorant on etc...hair etc... baby up bathes changed fed twice counseled a parent, coffee with a friend emailed the school made 14 Doctors appointments for my children, tried to hook up a printer, cleaned the house bleached the kids bathroom, and it is noon..... That all this morning. And I have volunteer work to get to now and why do I not feel like jumping right on that ??????????????????????????????????
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Saturday, September 4, 2010
BUDDY WALK 2010
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Friday, September 3, 2010
LOVE LOVE LOVE my life
How does one love so deeply when they thought they had loved as deep as possible yesterday. Each day something happens in my life that I feel such a passage to a deeper love than I ever thought possible. Maybe just taking in each day and being thankful for what I have and no longer looking at what I do not have strengthens my faith in my passion for life with the children... I can not put words on it, I feel it. When the kids look at me; Emma can shoot me a look, twitch her shoulder with pure attitude and shoot me the look of her love for me and I just melt... Lucas has the look of love for me that is his own.. I give him a solid chunk of chicken breast tonight and his jaw starts chewing like he knew exactly what the letter in the mail I had opened said... Please have your Doctor sign to provide a soft diet for Lucas as he can not chew solid foods and spits them out of swallows them whole....... HA! that look now as he is chewing this rather large piece of chicken is one I know he knows I know and that look just makes me laugh out loud when no one but he and I know why. Tressa, the look of my love to know exactly her body move, her loud as life language ... I need more to drink, I am the only adult... I go fill her cup and when I return all SEEMS the same EXCEPT a bowl is missing from the table.. You know that game you played in College or possibly High School where you see a scene and then it flashes and you have to recall exacts that you saw that you can not see now... WELL I have a keen sense these days in that part of my brain... The bowl of noodles for Jordan had vanished. My look of love right into Tressa's eyes and my words.... Tressa please go get Jordan's noodles and put them back on the table...she complies without incidence, Steven looks into my eyes like he was sworn to secrecy and than k you for not being upset with "me"...you see there was a day I would question why no one told but Tressa used that against the kids so I removed that power and a simple loving wink to Steven gives him the OK Tressa holds nothing over Mom...Kaitlyn is up and down with the flu, she today is struggling to be well and having a drag to her, she and I have had a wonderful week even with her sick. Well I have not forgotten Keirsten the love of my life.... the girl, the young woman the teen that has to keep that love balanced between teen/love.... You know when they turn about 12 or 13 until they hit about 17 and begin the climb down from the mountain of tho know everything and especially way more than their MOTHER.... well she too is having some loving moments as her 17th year of life is approaching.. Yes, I just read I forgot Jordan.... well most know he is my man, my left hand in life..LOL left hand and one eyebrow so a smirk of silly boy silly just knows how much I love him... SO again it is approaching year 50 and I can not think of a better way to live life.... How many people can share this much love in an afternoon..
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Kids say some of the funniest (pure truth)
I am not in the mood to blog...so much going on I would unravel if I dare list.
The other morning my grandson was having a rough morning with my daughter who is trying to help form him into a nice young lad...LOL With her husband in the same room... He being three is .... well here is how it went... My daughter said Carmelo are you back talking me? Carmelo said; "No mommy, I am talking at my front, see this is my back (points to his back) and this is my front (pointing to his front) I am taking at you from my front!................ LOL My daughter had to walk away...no she was not laughing. Her husband re-affirmed he is only telling it as he sees it... he has a point.
I was on the phone with my friend in Lehigh yesterday and Kaitlyn was sitting mext to me. Her phone service looses calls all the time. I said out loud Oh, I lost her.. Kailtyn asked who, I explained Gail, she is out in Lehigh. About an hour or so later Mandie came to work and Kaitlyn got all excited to tell Mandie Gail is lost in Lehigh. She seemed now upset that I was not reacting to Gail being lost in Lehigh and she is lost... LOL
The other morning my grandson was having a rough morning with my daughter who is trying to help form him into a nice young lad...LOL With her husband in the same room... He being three is .... well here is how it went... My daughter said Carmelo are you back talking me? Carmelo said; "No mommy, I am talking at my front, see this is my back (points to his back) and this is my front (pointing to his front) I am taking at you from my front!................ LOL My daughter had to walk away...no she was not laughing. Her husband re-affirmed he is only telling it as he sees it... he has a point.
I was on the phone with my friend in Lehigh yesterday and Kaitlyn was sitting mext to me. Her phone service looses calls all the time. I said out loud Oh, I lost her.. Kailtyn asked who, I explained Gail, she is out in Lehigh. About an hour or so later Mandie came to work and Kaitlyn got all excited to tell Mandie Gail is lost in Lehigh. She seemed now upset that I was not reacting to Gail being lost in Lehigh and she is lost... LOL
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Here's one for my special PEEPS
All the parents who wear my shoes will totally laugh..........
I am at a parenting crossroad.. My boys love to play dress up and "house" although they are too old as society would understand them continuing to play dress up..
Jordan was the Mom, Steven the Dad... you know where I am going. Well Jordan ran to tell me Steve kissed him on the lips. Steven is saying Jordan is a girl (because they are playing that Jordan is a girl) Jordan is in deep training right now we do not kiss on the lips "friends" because he has kissed on the lips in school and gotten written up... So confused by if you can in play or possibly this the opportunity to "turn in Steven" one would only be able to guess... My position as to listening and guiding as the parent was about like the best comedy show I have ever been to. Steven defending his kiss was to "a girl" playing his "wife" or the Mother to his children... and Jordan wanting me to be sure I understand Steve kissed him on the lips not vice a versa but admitting they kissed..... LOL my trying to sort it all to be sure everyone understands we are not kissing in pretend play or in school or anywhere at this point the others in the home are cracking up which in turn gets me off track.............. HOW DO WE PARENT THIS..LOL without cracking up. During the whole who kissed and a boy is a boy is a boy not to mention your brother, Tressa is crawling to the open kitchen door which I am standing literally 2 feet from as if she is going to make it to the graham crackers on the counter Emma is snacking on while I make dinner..... and totally bummed when I ask her to stand up and go back to her card game. I just had to share.. such funny moments that may not seem funny at all to you but living it is hysterical some moments.
I am at a parenting crossroad.. My boys love to play dress up and "house" although they are too old as society would understand them continuing to play dress up..
Jordan was the Mom, Steven the Dad... you know where I am going. Well Jordan ran to tell me Steve kissed him on the lips. Steven is saying Jordan is a girl (because they are playing that Jordan is a girl) Jordan is in deep training right now we do not kiss on the lips "friends" because he has kissed on the lips in school and gotten written up... So confused by if you can in play or possibly this the opportunity to "turn in Steven" one would only be able to guess... My position as to listening and guiding as the parent was about like the best comedy show I have ever been to. Steven defending his kiss was to "a girl" playing his "wife" or the Mother to his children... and Jordan wanting me to be sure I understand Steve kissed him on the lips not vice a versa but admitting they kissed..... LOL my trying to sort it all to be sure everyone understands we are not kissing in pretend play or in school or anywhere at this point the others in the home are cracking up which in turn gets me off track.............. HOW DO WE PARENT THIS..LOL without cracking up. During the whole who kissed and a boy is a boy is a boy not to mention your brother, Tressa is crawling to the open kitchen door which I am standing literally 2 feet from as if she is going to make it to the graham crackers on the counter Emma is snacking on while I make dinner..... and totally bummed when I ask her to stand up and go back to her card game. I just had to share.. such funny moments that may not seem funny at all to you but living it is hysterical some moments.
OT exercising w/ Tressa conversation is so PWS driven
As I sit here listening to Tressa with our OT doing exercises they are moving into the bicycling. Ms Jan Say's OK Tressa where are we going?
We are going to pizza hut, McDonald's, Burger King, APplebee's, I HOP, Taco Bell, Perkin's, Little Cesar's, I Hop again and how about Outback steak house.... I think she road her mind up Del Prado stopping at every food joint.. LOL
Ms Jan is cutting in saying, how about the park, how about kayaking, how about to the beach... and Tressa is very clear if she is going to exercise and not be on METFORMIN it is going to be driven by food imagination....
I had to take Tressa off her Metformin for the weekend to see what is happening with her blood sugar levels and let me tell you the difference from being on medication to not being on medication is so obvious. I had forgotten how awful it was OCD food related because she has been on the medication for a couple years and it took the food drive down... how soon we forget how well we have it when we get even a small reprieve... I have been crying in my pillow countless times this weekend dealing with the food seeking, driven OCD about food and her aggression to push me over to try to get to a bag of rolls I pray we are able to get back on medication the beginning of this week.....
We are going to pizza hut, McDonald's, Burger King, APplebee's, I HOP, Taco Bell, Perkin's, Little Cesar's, I Hop again and how about Outback steak house.... I think she road her mind up Del Prado stopping at every food joint.. LOL
Ms Jan is cutting in saying, how about the park, how about kayaking, how about to the beach... and Tressa is very clear if she is going to exercise and not be on METFORMIN it is going to be driven by food imagination....
I had to take Tressa off her Metformin for the weekend to see what is happening with her blood sugar levels and let me tell you the difference from being on medication to not being on medication is so obvious. I had forgotten how awful it was OCD food related because she has been on the medication for a couple years and it took the food drive down... how soon we forget how well we have it when we get even a small reprieve... I have been crying in my pillow countless times this weekend dealing with the food seeking, driven OCD about food and her aggression to push me over to try to get to a bag of rolls I pray we are able to get back on medication the beginning of this week.....
Friday, August 27, 2010
The first week of school year 2010-2011 is a near memory. All but Lucas had a flawless bus and busy back to school week. Keirsten seems a bit more organized although the social aspect seems to continue to be priority which is hindering her personal goals for the lifelong success of Keirsten... one day she will realize mom knew best although today she feels she could run the world.
Kaitlyn is so excited about the label of being an 8th EIGHTH GRADER as it has been planted into her head this is a great year and High School is next. She said all summer she just wants to go to High School so I am sure this was their motivator for her to make this a great year. Now for the funniest thing although men, this is total female...... yesterday she wore a new pair of shorts, they were TOO big and she didn't want to wear a belt as I instructed, she told me to never mind. I explained her pants would be falling down you must wear a belt. She wore it but took it off on the bus. LEFT IT ON THE BUS! Her shorts fell down nearly 1/2 her behind would show.... when she got home she did not have her belt and she told me what she had done.... well what I SAW was her hind end because she chose to put on her big sisters T back underpants!!! two bare skin round bunns hanging out for all to see...... LOL and then she says, Mom I started my period at school today... lovely!
Steven is doing the usual Steven avoiding doing work at school scribbling, today we GOT ORGANIZED! He has a 3 ring binder with each class and enough paper for a day or two, no markers, no color pencils and clear instruction he is going to work at school. We practiced which section was for which class and we labeled for him to understand... very sad he has been in school this long and is not reading "science" Makes me crazy!!! FLASH CARD PEOPLE FLASH CARDS!!!!!! He sure can read terminator, Ghost Busters, Monsters Inc, Dinosaur, etc...He could read science if he was flashed the word since 1st grade. I sure wish the general education department would read up on how to teach children with Down syndrome to read, it is research based. Also have how to teach Math to children with Down syndrome.
Jordan is not doing well staying awake in school, his meds were upped during the summer and side effects are tiredness, sleepiness, etc. He fell asleep standing up in front of the clinic worker. I stopped the meds after calling the doctor so we are going to see how it goes with no meds and if he needs something taker the lesser dose. Time will tell... him off meds would make me very happy.
Tressa is having swing sugar levels, 52 one day to 84 the next.... meds stopped on her as well until we see her Doctors,that is an overnight to Gainesville which takes planning... I am planning.
Lucas started today, I pray this is a great year for him.
Kaitlyn is so excited about the label of being an 8th EIGHTH GRADER as it has been planted into her head this is a great year and High School is next. She said all summer she just wants to go to High School so I am sure this was their motivator for her to make this a great year. Now for the funniest thing although men, this is total female...... yesterday she wore a new pair of shorts, they were TOO big and she didn't want to wear a belt as I instructed, she told me to never mind. I explained her pants would be falling down you must wear a belt. She wore it but took it off on the bus. LEFT IT ON THE BUS! Her shorts fell down nearly 1/2 her behind would show.... when she got home she did not have her belt and she told me what she had done.... well what I SAW was her hind end because she chose to put on her big sisters T back underpants!!! two bare skin round bunns hanging out for all to see...... LOL and then she says, Mom I started my period at school today... lovely!
Steven is doing the usual Steven avoiding doing work at school scribbling, today we GOT ORGANIZED! He has a 3 ring binder with each class and enough paper for a day or two, no markers, no color pencils and clear instruction he is going to work at school. We practiced which section was for which class and we labeled for him to understand... very sad he has been in school this long and is not reading "science" Makes me crazy!!! FLASH CARD PEOPLE FLASH CARDS!!!!!! He sure can read terminator, Ghost Busters, Monsters Inc, Dinosaur, etc...He could read science if he was flashed the word since 1st grade. I sure wish the general education department would read up on how to teach children with Down syndrome to read, it is research based. Also have how to teach Math to children with Down syndrome.
Jordan is not doing well staying awake in school, his meds were upped during the summer and side effects are tiredness, sleepiness, etc. He fell asleep standing up in front of the clinic worker. I stopped the meds after calling the doctor so we are going to see how it goes with no meds and if he needs something taker the lesser dose. Time will tell... him off meds would make me very happy.
Tressa is having swing sugar levels, 52 one day to 84 the next.... meds stopped on her as well until we see her Doctors,that is an overnight to Gainesville which takes planning... I am planning.
Lucas started today, I pray this is a great year for him.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Monday, August 23, 2010
I am thankful today because....
I have done laundry and no more laundry has piled up....
I have mopped the floor and no spills or messes need mopped up...
I have run the dishes and no more dishes have piled up...
I have ice frozen in the freezer
I have the temp set at 78 and it is 78 in here...YES!!!
I have cleaned a couple rooms deep clean and nothing has moved....
I have not argued with anyone since 8:54am
I have had no complaints about anything...
I have had no one ask for anything unreasonable.
I have not heard an argument...have not hear a cry, have not heard anything slam or crash, or a door open or close...
I have heard laughter, I have experienced little milestones reached.... and I will miss the chaos, tomorrow.
I have mopped the floor and no spills or messes need mopped up...
I have run the dishes and no more dishes have piled up...
I have ice frozen in the freezer
I have the temp set at 78 and it is 78 in here...YES!!!
I have cleaned a couple rooms deep clean and nothing has moved....
I have not argued with anyone since 8:54am
I have had no complaints about anything...
I have had no one ask for anything unreasonable.
I have not heard an argument...have not hear a cry, have not heard anything slam or crash, or a door open or close...
I have heard laughter, I have experienced little milestones reached.... and I will miss the chaos, tomorrow.
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